Post by Heyafella on Nov 28, 2019 18:45:44 GMT -7
(Note: this is more a rough collect of ideas more than proper dialogue and story so excuse the adverbs lol)
Stuck waiting in a crowded tsa line
Dan: This never would have happened if you booked us a first class flight like I told you to. Why do you guys never listen to anything I tell you?
Chris: Actually, this never would have happened if you hadn’t insisted (demanded?) on coming with us on our weekend getaway and besides we can’t afford to buy three first class tickets. And people who sit in first class still have to go through tsa too you know.
Dan: Can’t afford? What are you guys spending all your money on?.
Elise: It’s a real mystery Dan.
Dan: Anyway no one said you had to buy me a ticket that’s all on you.
Chris: we only gave in because Elise said if we didn’t you’d just stow away and get us kicked out of the airport.
Elise: Although in hindsight, you probably still will with how loud you’re being. Dan: It’s not my fault that EVERY EMPLOYEE IN THIS AIRPORT IS AN IMBECILE (makes voice extra a loud to get the notice of the TSA who frowns in their direction.)
Chris: Dan shush, don’t mess this up for me I’m really looking forward to going to (place) I heard (insert amazing or rare food comment) (Elise frowns) and of course I want the opportunity to spend quality time with Elise(says in nervously as an after thought) . I mean come on, it’s the least you could do considering we bought your ticket (Dan mumbles yeah an economic class ticket) and even payed for Mr. Mumbles to come along.
Dan:What was I supposed to do just leave her at home, she’d trash the place while I’m gone
Elise: Right, she’d trash the place, because your apartment is the picture of cleanliness
Dan:No one was asking you Elise (snaps) and anyway *she’d be extra lonely without me, isn’t that right Mr. Mumbles* (says in a loving/babying voice while looking into her cat carrier)
Mr Mumbles: Meows happily and looks out of carrier.
Chris: why do want to sit in first class so badly anyway?
Dan: Let me put this in a way your small mind can comprehend Chris, first class seats are the ultimate filter. They were invented as a way to separate the normal people like me, from the loud, annoying degenerates of our society and their loud,annoying children.
-elise get tripped up by the metal detector with various unusual weapons she explains she has for self -defense
- chris gets upset that he has to throw away his food in the tsa line, even though elise says they can buy more on the other side. Proceeds to eat everything to not let it go to waste. And announces to people in line that he’ll eat their food for them
-dan get startled when he starts to get pat down. Whoa touch me again buddy and I’ll sue you for assault. They’re all asked to step out of line.
Chris: Just great Dan, at this rate we’ll miss our flight.
Elise: Dan have you never gotten pat down by the tsa before?
Dan: I’m sorry but I’m not letting some random stranger off the street pat me down
Elise: Dan they’re security personnel and they have to pat us down, it’s a rule
Dan: Since when?( exclaims incredulously)
Elise: Since forever, it’s part of their job.
Dan: If they want to do that for a living there are plenty of other places they can work and get tipped for it too.
Chris:(whispers to Elise) I’m remembering a couple of our trips now and I think he’s never been pat down because they always mistake him for child Elise: understandable
Tsa: is your friend ready?
Elise: Dan if we get burgers while we wait for our flight will you please let them pat you down?
Dan: Fine, but I won’t like it. And that also means you’re buying me fries and a drink too.
-There’s a long line for the bathroom so Dan yells (is that guy carrying a bomb???) and happily goes inside the bathroom while everyone around him starts to panic and some airport security men tackle the random guy
-Dan calls the window seat (only to be seated near the emergency exit or a middle aisle seat and has a kid is kicking his chair)
- the airport annonuncement about safety is humorously pessimistic but the announcement is in a cheerful voice
Stuck waiting in a crowded tsa line
Dan: This never would have happened if you booked us a first class flight like I told you to. Why do you guys never listen to anything I tell you?
Chris: Actually, this never would have happened if you hadn’t insisted (demanded?) on coming with us on our weekend getaway and besides we can’t afford to buy three first class tickets. And people who sit in first class still have to go through tsa too you know.
Dan: Can’t afford? What are you guys spending all your money on?.
Elise: It’s a real mystery Dan.
Dan: Anyway no one said you had to buy me a ticket that’s all on you.
Chris: we only gave in because Elise said if we didn’t you’d just stow away and get us kicked out of the airport.
Elise: Although in hindsight, you probably still will with how loud you’re being. Dan: It’s not my fault that EVERY EMPLOYEE IN THIS AIRPORT IS AN IMBECILE (makes voice extra a loud to get the notice of the TSA who frowns in their direction.)
Chris: Dan shush, don’t mess this up for me I’m really looking forward to going to (place) I heard (insert amazing or rare food comment) (Elise frowns) and of course I want the opportunity to spend quality time with Elise(says in nervously as an after thought) . I mean come on, it’s the least you could do considering we bought your ticket (Dan mumbles yeah an economic class ticket) and even payed for Mr. Mumbles to come along.
Dan:What was I supposed to do just leave her at home, she’d trash the place while I’m gone
Elise: Right, she’d trash the place, because your apartment is the picture of cleanliness
Dan:No one was asking you Elise (snaps) and anyway *she’d be extra lonely without me, isn’t that right Mr. Mumbles* (says in a loving/babying voice while looking into her cat carrier)
Mr Mumbles: Meows happily and looks out of carrier.
Chris: why do want to sit in first class so badly anyway?
Dan: Let me put this in a way your small mind can comprehend Chris, first class seats are the ultimate filter. They were invented as a way to separate the normal people like me, from the loud, annoying degenerates of our society and their loud,annoying children.
-elise get tripped up by the metal detector with various unusual weapons she explains she has for self -defense
- chris gets upset that he has to throw away his food in the tsa line, even though elise says they can buy more on the other side. Proceeds to eat everything to not let it go to waste. And announces to people in line that he’ll eat their food for them
-dan get startled when he starts to get pat down. Whoa touch me again buddy and I’ll sue you for assault. They’re all asked to step out of line.
Chris: Just great Dan, at this rate we’ll miss our flight.
Elise: Dan have you never gotten pat down by the tsa before?
Dan: I’m sorry but I’m not letting some random stranger off the street pat me down
Elise: Dan they’re security personnel and they have to pat us down, it’s a rule
Dan: Since when?( exclaims incredulously)
Elise: Since forever, it’s part of their job.
Dan: If they want to do that for a living there are plenty of other places they can work and get tipped for it too.
Chris:(whispers to Elise) I’m remembering a couple of our trips now and I think he’s never been pat down because they always mistake him for child Elise: understandable
Tsa: is your friend ready?
Elise: Dan if we get burgers while we wait for our flight will you please let them pat you down?
Dan: Fine, but I won’t like it. And that also means you’re buying me fries and a drink too.
-There’s a long line for the bathroom so Dan yells (is that guy carrying a bomb???) and happily goes inside the bathroom while everyone around him starts to panic and some airport security men tackle the random guy
-Dan calls the window seat (only to be seated near the emergency exit or a middle aisle seat and has a kid is kicking his chair)
- the airport annonuncement about safety is humorously pessimistic but the announcement is in a cheerful voice